Once or twice a month, here at the office, we have important people who come to visit. We are warned ahead of time and asked to dress in “business casual.” This removes jeans & t-shirts from my wardrobe. It also removes piercings.

Now, I’m sorta okay with the attitude of “looking successful,” despite how disingenuous it feels in my soul. But what I don’t get is that they ask me to remove my visible piercings. I have one in my right nostril. When I take it out, I am left with a visible hole in my right nostril.

Which looks more successful? The guy with the fancy jewelry, or the guy with the third nostril?